I’m A Celebrity: Episode 8

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We’re at episode 8, can you believe it? I’m surprised this show hasn’t ended in disaster long before now. I mean, aside from the crazy imminent tropical storm that the Weird Hosts keep talking about. Woulda thought all the celebs would have gone crazy by now. Or maybe they have.

At the camp once again, the celebs react to Daniel’s departure. Janice is thrilled, everyone else seems a little upset. Janice antagonizes everyone, and lies on her cot. What else is new? Then everyone else bitches about Janice, especially once she starts talking about cooking for them. In the morning, a huge suprise! Janice and John Salley apologize to each other. Except not really, because in the interviews Janice doesn’t have much good to say about John.

A group luxury challenge comes up. Lou and John form one team, Torrie and Patti form the other team, and the prize is a relaxing massage. I wonder how much they had to pay the massage lady to come into the jungle. Salley tries every trick he’s got short of trash talk to distract Torrie, but she is having none of it, and the boys lose as John takes a fall into the water.

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Okay, later we hear Janice talk about her life to Lou. It is something of a sob story, but empathy is not coming easy for THIS audience member. Pathetic fallacy sets in, and the rain starts just before the celebs get the news that they’re going on a Scavenger Hunt. Everyone is cheered by this, at least until Janice starts playing the overzealous soccer mom and yelling at everyone. Most of the hunt items are found in Janice’s bag. Hmmmm. Sticky fingers?

Later, it is still raining. Thinking that he it is the way to control his own destiny, John Salley decides he wants to go home, but later decides to “man up” and concentrate on winning again. It’s so weird how people can just leave whenever they want on this show. It is Pampered Survivor after all.

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Sanjaya decides to make deep fried potatoes. Which was the wrong idea, considering they don’t have enough oil to do that, and the food takes forever. The celebs are grumpy, especially Janice, who complains, but Sanjaya politely tells her to shut the hell up. Well done, Sanjaya!

Did I mention, by the way, that I hate the clips of weird bugs running about between segments. Then Janice starts bitching about being constipated, which is only slightly better than bugs. I cannot win. They keep making allusions to Janice getting really sick before the commercials. I wonder if her intestines are gonna rupture or something. Can that happen? That could be a scary challenge all on its own.

One boring heart warming moment between Patti and John later, America votes for Torrie and Sanjaya to face the Tunnel of Terror. It seems like these two do everything around here. As expected, it is a tunnel of bugs. I’m gonna have my eyes closed for this, so I’ll tell you what I hear. Sanjaya goes in first. Ugh, the hosts keep calling out what’s in the little holes, which is information I’d rather not know. Sanjaya comes back with 19 out of 20 stars, wow. Out of everyone on this show, this dude is the most consistently impressive. Torrie only manages 18 stars, so I guess she’s gonna be hungry even after all that effort. I would NOT appreciate that after the tarrantulas.

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It seems that Janice really is pretty ill with some kinda viral infection, and the ambulance comes to get her. Back at camp, the celebs are worried about her, which is surprising after all the shenanigans she’s pulled. In a mildly exciting turn of events, the onsite security comes around late that night to catch a (hopefully deadly) snake that crept into camp. Pampered Survivor indeed! This makes Stephen Baldwin realize they are actually in the jungle, and not on a movie set. I’m amazed at this guy’s intelligence. Then Janice comes back feeling 110% better. She was probably so thrilled to be able to poop in a real toilet at the doctor’s office.

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As the new leader competition approaches, the celebs talk about how awesome a camp leader Lou Diamond was, and prepare to compete for their next leader, even though they (ie: a very loud Stephen Baldwin) wish they could vote him in for a third term. The challenge this time: reading America’s mind to get a chance to vote for camp leader. Tricky, I’m sure. Janice gets voted the laziest camper, and get eliminated from the leader competition first. No surprises there. Eventually John is voted the new camp leader, as well as most intelligent and hardest working. John gets pictures of his family as a prize for winning camp leader.

This episode really seems to be trying to eliminate the fighting and go towards the touching moments, as everyone sits around the fire and talks about their favourite person at camp. Yet, it is still kinda dull. Janice is voted no one’s favourite, but votes everyone as her favourite person. Not really sure how that works, since she yells at everyone all day. Janice is MY favourite person, though. I dunno what I’d do without her to write about.

So at last, we see the scary scary rainstorm that approaches the celebs camp. We find out that the celebs had been evacuated from their camp (into the jungle confessional, LOL) because of the storm, but they are now on the way to the immunity challenge since the storm has passed. As usual, the episode cuts off before the “really interesting” immunity challenge starts. I guess we’ll just have to wait until later tonight to find out what happens? We’ll all be glued to the screen, I’m sure.

Quotes:

Janice: “I was a vegetarian in 1978.”
Stephen: “I think Janice cooking for us would be worse than the great flood that Noah experienced in the Bible.”
Janice: (about Torrie) “She’s a beast!”
Janice: “I’m very open, and very vulnerable.”
Lou: (about Janice) “I’m sure she’s a slinky panther on the runway, but she looked more like Forest Gump, running for this scavenger hunt.”
Stephen: (when Sanjaya tells Janice off) “Fight fight fight fight fight! My money’s on Sanjaya.”
Janice: “It’s time for prunes.”
Patti: “Did you see when those ninjas were over there?”
John: “I love my friend Patti best, my BFF in camp.” (Lol, he said BFF)